He's So Small, He's A Waste Of

An Actor's Popularity Is Fleeting. His Success Has The Life Expectancy Of A Small Boy Who Is About To Look Into A Gas Tank With A Lighted Match.

All That The Comedian Has To Show For His Years Of Work And Aggravation Is The Echo Of Forgotten Laughter.

When Jack Benny Plays The Violin, It Sounds As Though The Strings Are Still In The Cat.

I Learned Law So Well, The Day I Graduated I Sued The College, Won The Case, And Got My Tuition Back.

He Always Had A Chip On His Shoulder That He Was Ready To Use To Kindle An Argument.