Half Of All Home Accidents Happen In

A Man Can Please His Wife With A Box Of Candy, Surprise Her With A Bouquet Of Flowers, And Make Her Suspicious With A Gold Bracelet.

Inflation Is When You Pay Fifteen Dollars For The Ten-dollar Haircut You Used To Get For Five Dollars When You Had Hair.

Nobody's Too Fat - They're Just Too Short.

It's Not The Hours You Put In Your Work That Counts, It's The Work You Put In The Hours.

When A Husband Says, "i Run Things In My Home" He May Mean The Washing Machine, The Dishwasher And The Vacuum Cleaner.