I Do Realise That When I Laugh,

I Do Realise That When I Laugh, It Sounds Like A Seal Is Being Molested.

Throwing Acid Is Wrong... In Some People's Eyes.

Even If You're Doing The National Insurance Awards, There's Still That Excitement When You Wonder Who Is Going To Win, Er, Best Premiums.

If Only Africa Had More Mosquito Nets Then Every Year We Could Save Millions Of Mosquitoes From Dying Needlessly Of Aids.

A Surprising Amount Of My Jokes Sound Very Implausible But Are True.