I Have So Little Sex Appeal That

Can We Talk?

Having My Daughter, I Screamed For Twenty-three Hours Straight. And That Was Just During Conception.

The Last Time I Appeared In Las Vegas, They Were Wearing Hoop Skirts And Davy Crockett Hats, ... But They Say 'what Happens In Vegas, Stays In Vegas.' And As Far As Fashion Is Concerned, That's A Good Thing.

I Hate Thin People; 'oh, Does The Tampon Make Me Look Fat?'

I Am Furious About Everything.