I Just Filled Out My Income Tax

I Gave My Wife A Twenty-five-dollar Gift Certificate. She Used It As A Down Payment On A Mink Coat.

My Wife Calls Our Waterbed The Dead Sea.

I'd Rather Be A Could-be If I Cannot Be An Are; Because A Could-be Is A Maybe Who Is Reaching For A Star. I'd Rather Be A Has-been Than A Might-have-been, By Far; For A Might Have-been Has Never Been, But A Has Was Once An Are.

Committee - A Group Of Men Who Keep Minutes And Waste Hours.

My Son Really Has The Spirit Of Valentine's Day. When He Was In College, He Used To Send His Mother A Heart-shaped Box Of Laundry.