My Son Really Has The Spirit Of

He Was Such A Bad Writer, They Revoked His Poetic License.

My Son Really Has The Spirit Of Valentine's Day. When He Was In College, He Used To Send His Mother A Heart-shaped Box Of Laundry.

I Was In A Department Store And I Saw A Weird-looking Gadget. I Asked The Young Saleslady What It Was. She Answered, "it Doesn't Do Anything. It's Just A Christmas Gift."

If Opportunity Doesn't Knock, Build A Door, But Only As Long As It's Not Visible From The Street.

A Man Is Hit By A Car While Crossing A Beverly Hills Street. A Woman Rushes To Him And Cradles His Head In Her Lap, Asking, Are You Comfortable? The Man Answers, I Make A Nice Living.