I Spent The First 25 Years Of

I Tend Not To Trust People Who Live In Very Tidy Houses. I Know That On The Surface There Is Nothing Wrong With A Person Being Well-ordered And Disciplined. Nothing, Except That It Leaves The Impression Of That Person Having Lived In The Confines Of A Stark Institution Which, Although He Or She Has Long Since Left, Remains Within.

I Had A Longing For Ritual, Something I Could Cling To, A Routine To Make Me Feel Well And Contented. I Hoped That Reading Bible Commentaries And Theological Critiques Would Nudge Me Closer To Some Kind Of Absolute That I Could Hold Up As A Torch To Light My Way.

I Really Like Rustic Mediterranean Cooking. And I Like Trying Out Curry Takeaways.

My Character, Rick Spleen, Is A What-if Version Of Me, Really, Where Nothing Did Quite Turn Out Right And Everything Else Is Still Around The Corner.

One Saturday In 1984, I Walked Into My First Aa Meeting. I Went Regularly For Six Years And Only Stopped When I Came To Realize My Underlying Problem Was Not Genuine Alcoholism, But Depression.