I Went Through Baseball As A Player

Being Traded Is Like Celebrating Your 100th Birthday. It Might Not Be The Happiest Occasion In The World, But Consider The Alternative.

I Know A Baseball Star Who Wouldn't Report The Theft Of His Wife's Credit Cards Because The Thief Spends Less Than She Does.

Never Trust A Baserunner With A Limp. Comes A Base Hit And You'll Think He Just Got Back From Lourdes.

It Seems The Baseball Player Of Today Will Not Be Satisfied Until He Plays Two Weeks In The Big League And Is Able To Retire At Twenty-two.

One Thing You Learned As A Cubs Fan: When You Bought You Ticket, You Could Bank On Seeing The Bottom Of The Ninth.