If I Had Been Born Ugly, You

If You Make Up Your Own Mind, You Can Only Blame Yourself.

People Say You Have To Hit Rock Bottom, And, I Can Tell You, Almost Dying Is As Rock Bottom As It Gets.

He Can't Kick With His Left Foot, He Can't Head A Ball, He Can't Tackle And He Doesn't Score Many Goals. Apart From That He's All Right.

In 1969 I Gave Up Women And Alcohol - It Was The Worst 20 Minutes Of My Life.

I Must Be The Only Person In The World Who's Looking Forward To Going Into Hospital. I Can't Wait To Get It Over And Done With.