If The #2 Pencil Is The Most

No Matter What You Do, No Matter How Hard You Try, You're Screwed Because It's All Fixed And Rigged. There Is A Club And You Ain't In It.

People Always Tell Me "have A Nice Day." Well What If I Don't Want To? What If I Want To Have A Crappy Day?

The Muslims Observe Their Sabbath On Friday, The Jews Observe On Saturday, And The Christians On Sunday. By The Time Monday Rolls Around God Is Completely F***in' Worn Out.

The Truth Is, Pavlov's Dog Trained Pavlov To Ring This Bell Just Before The Dog Salivated.

Beethoven Was So Hard Of Hearing, He Thought He Was A Painter.