If You Can't Make Fun Of Yourself,

When A Man Has A Birthday, He Takes A Day Off. When A Woman Has A Birthday, She Takes At Least Three Years Off.

I Love Israel For Its Blue And White Flag As It Matches My Legs.

My Breasts Are So Low, Now I Can Have A Mammogram And A Pedicure At The Same Time.

The Palestinians Cannot Throw Rockets And Expect People Not To Defend Themselves

The Glass Is Always Half Empty. All Good Comedians Are Manic-depressive.