It's Very Rare That An Older Comedian

I Had A Life Experience That Most Of My - That None Of My Friends Had. I Remember I Became Everybody's Rabbi. Everybody Who Needed Advice Would Talk To Me, And It Became An Obvious Thing.

I Don't Think It's Unfair To Have Writers. I Think If You're Going To Do A Roast On Television, As If You Were Doing A Play Or You Were Reading A Script Of A Movie, You Would Have The Best Possible Material. And Those Are The People Who Score, The People Who Are Willing To Listen To The Roasting Experts And Then Come Out There And Own That Material.

Do You Want Me To Apologize After Every Joke? If It Doesn't Offend Somebody It's Probably Not A Joke. It's Probably An Observation That's Not Funny. It's Gotta Offend Somebody Somewhere.

I've Always Liked Cops, As Much As You Can Like A Group Of People, You Know? Sure, I've Been Hassled, But I'm A White Dude - Privileged.

Last Time I Was In Canada Celine Dion Had Just Given Birth To Identical Twins. Which Is Quite An Achievement Given Her Age And Face.