Note To Self... Sex With Blow-up Doll

I'm Not Original, But I Strive Toward It As Much As Possible. I Tried Really Hard On Weekend Update To Do Something That I Considered Original, Which Was, I Tried To Cut All Cleverness Out Of The Joke.

With The Ambitious, The Failure Of One Expedient Is The Suggestion Of Another; But With The Irresolute, Defeat Usually Occasions Abandonment Of Purpose.

It Is Easier To Hate Those We Love, Than Love Those Whom We Have Hated.

My Dad Had This Thing - Everyone In Canada Wants To Play Hockey; That's All They Want To Do. So When I Was A Kid, Whenever We Skated My Dad Would Not Let Us On The Ice Without Hockey Sticks, Because Of This Insane Fear We Would Become Figure Skaters!

You Ever Be Having A Really Good Dream, And Then, Uh- Right In The Middle Of The Dream You Wake Up, Right In The Best Part Of The Dream? And There You Are, Back In Your Stinkin' Life Again? Man, That's Rough, Eh?