Once I Found Out How Much An

If It's January, I'm Dead In Three Hours. But In June, I'd Be Hungry, But I'd Make It Out. I'd Find My Way Without A Map Or Compass. I Say That With Confidence. I Can Build A Fire Without A Match.

Stand-up Is A Real Art Form In Itself And One That I Really Think To Be Good At You Have To Devote Your Entire Life To. It's The Really, Really Good Ones That End Up Getting To Do The Things That I Like To Do: Movies, Tv Shows, And Stuff Like That. It's A Really Hard Gig And It Just Never Called To Me.

I Peed In My Wife's Boot Once. On Honeymoon, In Madrid, We Were Drinking Absinthe And Somehow Made It Back To Our Hotel. I Don't Remember A Second Of This, But My Wife Woke Up To This Noise. Two Of Her Boots Were In The Corner, One Had Fallen Down And The Other Was Standing Up And I Was Peeing Into It! It Was A Hole, And It Looked Like A Toilet. She Said: "rob, Wake Up, You're Peeing Into My Shoe!"

I Have A Wife And Two Daughters; People Who Depend On Me. Everything Is More Important Than It Was When I Was 20. But Now I'm Like, "eh, I Made It This Far."

I Have To Stay True To Myself.