Scotch Needs Water Like A Fish Needs

Happiness Means Quiet Nerves.

All The Men In My Family Were Bearded, And Most Of The Women.

I Could Juggle Anything In My Day. Balls, Cigar Boxes, Knives...but There Was One Thing I Could Never Juggle. My Income Tax.

How Well I Remember My First Encounter With The Devil'ss Brew. I Happened To Stumble Across A Case Of Bourbon - And Went Right On Stumbling For Several Days Thereafter.

Now Don't Say You Can't Swear Off Drinking; It's Easy. I've Done It A Thousand Times.