So I Said To This Train Driver

So A Lorry-load Of Tortoises Crashed Into A Train-load Of Terrapins, I Thought "that's A Turtle Disaster".

I Went To The Dentist. He Said "say Aaah." I Said "why?" He Said "my Dog's Died."

Well, My Wife And I Were Married In A Toilet - It Was A Marriage Of Convenience!

I Went Into A French Restaraunt And Asked The Waiter, 'have You Got Frog's Legs?' He Said, 'yes,' So I Said, 'well Hop Into The Kitchen And Get Me A Cheese Sandwich.'

My Wife Had A Go At Me Last Night. She Said, Youll Drive Me To My Grave. I Had The Car Out In Thirty Seconds.