The Oboe Sounds Like A Clarinet With

I Wish To Thank My Parents For Making It All Possible? And I Wish To Thank My Children For Making It Necessary.

(responding To A Sneeze From The Audience) Who Exploded?

He Was Happily Married - But His Wife Wasn't.

The Conductor Is A Peculiar Person. He Turns His Back On His Friends In The Audience, Shakes A Stick At His Players In The Orchestra, And Then Wonders Why Nobody Loves Him.

That's Why I've Never Thought Of Retiring Because I Do It All The Time Whether On The Stage Or Off. I Found That In A Precarious Situation, A Smile Is The Shortest Distance Between People. When One Needs To Reach Out For Sympathy Or A Link With People, What Better Way Is There?