The River Trent Is Lovely, I Know

If God Had Wanted Us To Play Football In The Sky, He'd Have Put Grass Up There.

Who The Hell Wants Fourteen Pairs Of Shoes When They Go On Holiday? I Haven't Had Fourteen Pairs In My Life.

Being Thick Isn't An Affliction If You're A Footballer, Because Your Brains Need To Be In Your Feet. And Beckham Works Hard, He's Brave And He Crosses A Ball Superbly. He Treats A Football Like He Does A Wife, Lovingly, With Caresses.

They Love Me For What I'm Not They Hate Me For What I Am.

It Only Takes A Second To Score A Goal.