There Are A Lot Of Things Money

I Like To Think Of Myself As The Middleman Between Fred Allen And Henny Youngman.

I Bought My Mother-in-law A Beautiful Chair For Christmas, But She Won't Let Me Plug It In.

I Just Bought A Great Gift For My Boss - A Leaky Ant Farm.

My Son Asked For Very Little - A Kickstand, With A Motorcycle Attached.

The Post Office Is Very Careful Nowadays. When They Get A Package Marked "fragile," They Throw It Underhand.