Tread Gently On Anyone Who Looks At

I Used To Be A Folk Singer, But I Was... Dreadful. I Had A Voice Like A Goose Farting In The Fog.

I'd Never Consciously Left Home To See A Zombie Movie. They Were Fine By Me, But I Had No Intention Of Ever Being In One. But I've Been Learning More About It As I've Been Doing Interviews. I Didn't Even Know There Were Specialist Zombie Magazines And Clubs. I Heard The Other Day That A Radio Station Had Asked People If They`d Made Preparations For An Attack By Zombies, And A Staggering Number Of People Replied Yes!

I'm A Citizen Of The World. I Like It That Way. The World's A Wonderful. I Just Think That Some People Are Pretty Badly Represented. But When You Speak To The People Themselves They're Delightful. They All Want So Little.

I'm A Huge Film Star... But You Have To Hurry To The Movies, Because I Usually Die In The First 15 F--ing Minutes. I'm The Only Guy I Know Who Died In A F--ing Muppet Movie.

My Advice To You, If You Want To Lose A Bit Of Weight: Don't Eat Anything That Comes In A Bucket. Buckets Are The Kitchen Utensils Of The Farmyard.