What Was The First Cat That Talked

You Notice How They Always Put The Fruit And Veg At The Entrance To The Supermarket? You Go In Thinking 'this Is A Fresh Shop, Everything In Here Is Fresh! I Will Do Well To Shop Here'. You Never Go Straight To The Bit With The Toilet Paper, Loo Brushes And Such Do You? You'd Think 'this Is A Poo Shop! Everything In Here Is Themed On Poo!

The Pope Is Guarded By The Swiss Guard Who Stand Proudly In Pajamas And Silly Hats.

I Want To Be A Taxidermist! I Wanna Fill Animals With Sand. I Wanna Get More Sand Into An Animal Than Anybody Has Ever Bloody Got In One. I Wanna Fill A Rat With The Entire Gobi Desert, So It’s Really Quite Tight.

Mac Gave Me 55 Lipsticks To Test. These Are The Same Lipsticks I Got Caught Stealing By The Police When I Was 15. How Ironic.

We Have Two Hundred Languages In Europe. Two Hundred Languages! Count Them! I Know You Won't!