When You Eat A Lot Of Spicy

Recently My Girlfriend Asked Me If I Was Having Sex Behind Her Back And I Replied, "yes, Who Did You Think It Was?"

The Bigger The Audience, The Better With Comedy.

All Comedians Are A Bit Attention-seeking And I'm No Different. Anyone With The Audacity To Want To Be Listened To For An Hour And A Half Must Be.

Cats Have Nine Lives. Makes Them Ideal For Experimentation.

I Did A Gig In The U.s. Once For The Homeless. I Said 'it's Nice To See So Many Bums On Seats.'