Without Fake Tan I Have The Skin

I Have Always Had A Need For Attention But Didn't Plan To Be A Comic.

The Only Way To Go On Holiday Is With Your Expectations At Ground Level. Convince Yourself Before You Go That The Weather's Going To Be Dreadful And There Will Be Nylon Sheets. You'll Then Be Pleasantly Surprised.

I Have A Fear Of Poverty In Old Age. I Have This Vision Of Myself Living In A Skip And Eating Cat Food. It's Because I'm Freelance, And I've Never Had A Proper Job. I Don't Have A Pension, And My Savings Are Dwindling. I Always Thought Someone Would Just Come Along And Look After Me.

I've Got A Hat Face. My Mother Always Said I've Got A Hat Face

I Have A Very Solo Career. I Only Write With People That I Really Adore.