You Might Be A Redneck If You

I Got My Wife A Mood Ring. It Works Real Good! When Shes In A Good Mood It Turns Blue, But When Shes In A Bad Mood Theres A Red Mark Across My Forehead

I Love Comedy. God Has Given Me This Platform.

The Stuff That Made Me Mad 20 Years Ago Doesn't Really Make Me Mad Any More.

I Wish I Could Relate To The People I'm Related To.

I Turned Down A Movie This Summer Because It Was Nine Weeks In Vancouver And My Oldest Daughter Is 14. I've Got Four More Summers With Her. I'm Not Giving Away Nine Weeks Of Her Summer To Go Do A Silly Movie.