You Might Be A Redneck If You

That's The Great Thing About A Tractor. You Can't Really Hear The Phone Ring.

You Know That You Are A Teacher When You Spend More Money On School Stuff Than You Do On Your Own Children.

I Just Love People. I Love This Country. I Am The American Dream. I Grew Up By The Airport With A Dirt Yard. Never In My Life Should I Have Been A Success. So That's What I Love About This Country [usa], Is You Get Out There And You Have The Opportunity And You Work Hard At It, And You Can Be A Success.

You Might Be A Redneck If... Your High School Basketball Game Got Rained Out.

The Things That I'm Talking About Not Knowing, They're Not Mysteries Of The Universe; It's Just Stuff I Thought I Would Know By The Time I Was Thirty-nine.