Flattery Won't Hurt You If You Don't

My Idea Of Walking Into The Jaws Of Death Is Marrying Some Woman Who Has Lost Three Husbands.

I'm Sorry To Inform You That Your 50 Year Warranty Has Expired On Your Back, Knees, And Memory. Luckily Your Lifetime Warranty On Your Heart Is Still In Effect. Of Course, That Becomes Void And Expires When You Do.

We're All Self-made Men, But Not Very Many Of Us Have Stayed On The Job.

Many A Family Tree Needs Trimming

If You Haven't Seen Your Wife Smile At A Traffic Cop, You Haven't Seen Her Smile Her Prettiest.