He Writes So Well He Makes Me

We Are Living In The Machine Age. For The First Time In History The Comedian Has Been Compelled To Supply Himself With Jokes And Comedy Material To Compete With The Machine. Whether He Knows It Or Not, The Comedian Is On A Treadmill To Oblivion.

I Don't Want To Own Anything That Won't Fit Into My Coffin.

An Advertising Agency Is 85 Percent Confusion And 15 Percent Commission.

English Coffee Tastes Like Water That Has Been Squeezed Out Of A Wet Sleeve.

My Agent Gets 10 Percent Of Everything I Get, Except The Blinding Headaches.