I Learned To Play The Piano On

Did You Know That Mozart Had No Arms And No Legs? I've Seen Statues Of Him On People's Pianos.

Humor Is Something That Thrives Between Man's Aspirations And His Limitations. There Is More Logic In Humor Than In Anything Else. Because, You See, Humor Is Truth.

He Was Happily Married - But His Wife Wasn't.

And Now, In Honour Of The 150th Anniversary Of Beethoven's Death, I Would Like To Play 'clear The Saloon', Er, 'clair De Lune', By Debussy. I Don't Play Beethoven So Well, But I Play Debussy Very Badly, And Beethoven Would Have Liked That.

The Oboe Sounds Like A Clarinet With A Cold.