I'm The Guy That Made Joe Dimaggio

A Lot Of Things Run Through Your Head When You're Going In To Relieve In A Tight Spot. One Of Them Was, "should I Spike Myself?"

I Was The Worst Hitter Ever. I Never Even Broke A Bat Until Last Year When I Was Backing Out Of The Garage.

You Just Can't Imagine The Kind Of Guy He Was Without Seeing Him Play. He Was A Circus, A Play, A Movie, All Rolled Into One.

I've Got A New Invention. It's A Revolving Bowl For Tired Goldfish.

I'd Rather Be Lucky Than Good