Men Like Phones With Lots Of Buttons.

Men Forget Everything; Women Remember Everything. That's Why Men Need Instant Replay In Sports. They've Already Forgotten What's Happened.

When Men Break Up They Want To Remain Friends. Why? Why Can't They Just Get Lost?

At The End Of Every Year, I Add Up The Time That I Have Spent On The Phone On Hold And Subtract It From My Age. I Don't Count That Time As Really Living. I Spend More And More Time On Hold Each Year. By The Time I Die, I'm Going To Be Quite Young.

Men Don't Get Cellulite. God Might Just Be A Man.

The Closest I Ever Came To A Menage-a-trois Was When I Dated A Schizophrenic.