On Halloween, The Parents Sent Their Kids

I Looked Up My Family Tree And Found Out I Was The Sap.

Oh, When I Was A Kid In Show Business I Was Poor. I Used To Go To Orgies To Eat The Grapes.

Better To Keep Quiet And Let People Think You're An Idiot Than Speak Up And Confirm It.

With Girls, I Don't Think Right. I Had A Date With One Girl, She Had Mirrors All Over Her Bedroom. She Told Me To Come Over And Bring A Bottle. I Got Windex.

My Wife's So Dumb, She Got A Nail In The Spare!!