Quote Me As Saying I Was Mis-quoted.

I, Not Events, Have The Power To Make Me Happy Or Unhappy Today. I Can Choose Which It Shall Be. Yesterday Is Dead, Tomorrow Hasn't Arrived Yet. I Have Just One Day, Today, And I'm Going To Be Happy In It.

There's A Man Outside With A Big Black Mustache. - Tell Him I've Got One.

This Book Was Written In Those Long Hours I Spent Waiting For My Wife To Get Dressed To Go Out. And If She Had Never Gotten Dressed At All This Book Would Never Have Been Written.

No, Groucho Is Not My Real Name. I Am Breaking It In For A Friend.

You Call This A Party? The Beer Is Warm, The Women Cold And I'm Hot Under The Collar.