Well, My Brother Says 'hello.' So, Hooray

I'm Not Catholic, But I Gave Up Picking My Belly Button For Lint.

I Asked God For A Bike, But I Know God Doesn't Work That Way. So I Stole A Bike And Asked For Forgiveness.

My Parents Had Very Strict Rules For Me. Rules Like, I Couldn't Be Home Until A Certain Hour.

Don't Wear Fur! Did You Know, A Single Fur Coat Takes Fifteen Trees, Just For The Protest Signs?

You Know What I Hate? Indian Givers... No, I Take That Back.